have been away since a long long long time….has been busy with many things

In the midst of all tensions and work pressures there came an educatonal tour to Delhi and North India(shimla,manali,punjab,rajasthan)..Well…the moment we heard about the tour..we unanimously refused to go!!!But since it was compulsory and a requirement in the syllabus,we finally agreed.

Thanks to the railways…we had an amazing start..the train that was expected at 7.30 came at 10.30…after the long wait we boarded the train and as fate would have it..I got the most wonderful seat in the train-the one  beside the toilet .My teacher  has always told me to look at the bright side of things and the bright side here was that I could keep a watch on when the toilets are vacant and transmit  this valuable information to my friends ..well.. the noxious stimuli that I was exposed to during the journey anesthetized the olfactory area of my brain…

Once we reached our destination…we were welcomed and taken to our respective rooms..some were happy with the room size,some were not.some had issues with the lighting in the rooms and some others were not comfortable with the bath tubs!!!!!the rest of the tour  was wonderful with long distance night travels in busses,..fights for single seats,so that we could stretch ourselves and sleep..Airconditioned buses with sealed windows in manali and shimla….frantic search for loos…demands of dal fry  and sabudaana wadas from purely south indian cooks who were experts in rasam and curd rice ..the clash of roti versus chaawal…the never ending  shopping and then bragging about the price and quality of the things bought…the punctuality with  which schedules were followed.. the list is never ending.

In spite of all the differences in opinions and outlook,there were some who enjoyed the trip to the fullest,and I am one of them..well!!dont ask me the educational part of it..but the rest was too good!!!!heres a small video of our epic tour….

Seeti..seeti…seeti….vote kara seetilaa!!!(vote for the whistle)well!!i still don’t know the candidates name..all I know is seeti…

It was futile reasoning with the kids not to blow whistles .but the election saga doesn’t end here..After about an hour, some people with Bats (cricket bat) came knocking at the door and said

Vote for bat….aap ka vote bat ka vote.

….I expected them to give me a bat as a promotional activity but I was disappointed, I din not get one but Sumit got a bat ….he’s looking out for someone to come and give him a ball (cricket ball)!!!And I am waiting for the` vote for gas cylinder’ party to come knocking at my door with a gas cylinder….

• “TO LIVE, TO ERR, TO FALL, TO TRIUMPH, TO RECREATE LIFE OUT OF LIFE.” – JAMES JOYCE;
• “SEE THINGS NOT AS THEY ARE, BUT AS THEY MIGHT BE.”-A quote from the book, “American Prometheus”;
• “WHAT I CANNOT BUILD, I CANNOT UNDERSTAND.” – RICHARD FEYNMAN.

This is the synthetic DNA that Craig venter and his team developed in the J.CRAIG VENTER INSTITUTE(JCVI)after 15 years of extensive hard work and toil.the organism Mycoplasma mycoides is a self replicating synthetic organism whose DNA is synthetically prepared by a computer and then transplanted into the cell of a bacterium.
This breakthrough has evoked mixed responses from the scientific community.On one hand it will be easier to make vaccines in relatively less time and discover new vaccines for many disorders,and bring about solutions to various environmental issues,on the other hand there looms a threat of the discovery falling into the wrong hands and unfortunate events like bioterrorism and development of unknown new species of organisms developing.
here’s an excellent video of Craig Venter unveiling his work.

craig_venter_unveils_synthetic_life.html

post your comments about your opinion on the topic.

Final Exam

INSTRUCTIONS: Read each question carefully. Answer all questions. Time limit: 4 hours. Begin immediately.

HISTORY: Describe the history of the papacy from its origins to the present day, concentrating especially, but not exclusively, on its social, political, economic, religious, and philosophical impact on Europe, Asia, America, and Africa. Be brief, concise, and specific.

MEDICINE: You have been provided with a razor blade, a piece of gauze and a bottle of scotch. Remove your appendix. Do not suture until your work has been inspected. You have fifteen minutes.

PUBLIC SPEAKING: 2500 riot-crazed aborigines are storming the classroom. Calm them. You may use any ancient language except Latin or Greek.

BIOLOGY: Create life. Estimate the differences in subsequent human culture if this form of life had developed 500 million years earlier, with special attention to it probable effect on the English parliamentary system. Prove your thesis.

MUSIC: Write a piano concerto. Orchestrate and perform it with a flute and drum. You will find a piano under your seat.

PSYCHOLOGY: Based on your knowledge of their works, evaluate the emotional stability, degree of adjustment, and repressed frustrations of each of the following: Alexander of Aphrodisias, Rameses II, Gregory of Nicia, Hammurabi. Support your evaluation with quotations from each man’s work, making appropriate references. It is not necessary to translate.

SOCIOLOGY: Estimate the sociological problems which might accompany the end of the world. Construct an experiment to test your theory.

ENGINEERING: The disassembled parts of a high-powered rifle have been placed on your desk. You will also find an instruction manual, printed in Swahili. In 10 minutes a hungry Bengal tiger will be admitted to the room. Take whatever action you feel appropriate. Be prepared to justify your decision.

ECONOMICS: Develop a realistic plan for refinancing the national debt. Trace the possible effects of your plan in the following areas: Cubism, the Donatist controversy, the wave theory of light. Outline a method from all possible points of view, as demonstrated in your answer to the last question.

POLITICAL SCIENCE: There is a red telephone on the desk beside you. Start World War III. Report at length on its socio-political effects, if any.

EPISTEMOLOGY: Take a position for or against truth. Prove the validity of your stand.

PHYSICS: Explain the nature of matter. Include in your answer an evaluation of the impact of the development of mathematics on science.

PHILOSOPHY: Sketch the development of human thought, estimate its significance. Compare with the development of any other kind of thought.

GENERAL KNOWLEDGE: Describe in detail. Be objective and specific.

If you finish early turn your paper in at the table at the front of the room.

(source-internet)

It all started when my moms friend called her up to tell the good news of her sons marriage. well the problem is that like the story plot of chetan Bhagat’s two states ,the guy and girl are from two different parts of kerala…one from the south and another from the north of kerala…Now if you are a keralite you would know the gravity of the problem…It ranges from the venue of the marriage to the cuisine ..The grooms family wants the marriage to be at a particular church and the brides family at their own church..the grooms family wants the typical north keralian cuisine while the brides family the south keralian one..the grooms family wants to buy a particular kind of saree for the bride,the brides family tells its the bride who selects the saree….the grooms family wants the bride to reach the church by herself with her family but the brides family says the groom’s cousins have to accompany the bride to the marriage venue…..the grooms family says they give sugar to the bridegroom as a good luck gesture,the bride’s family say they give jaggery!!!!   …they have agreed to disagree on anything and everything….

The poor guy and the girl are both born and brought up in a metropolitan city of India..they dont even know how to speak proper malayalam,forget about the customs and traditions of kerala….

well!!!now my mom was describing all this and added a note of caution..that its very difficult for marriages to work if they are from north and south kerala…..  It was a message to me…that “you better not find a guy like that…we’ll find the right one for you”- the boy who suits our customs and traditions!!!!!       Is there any “AMAN KI ASHA ” possible here      

You are a nurse if….

you can SEE germs on every tap,doorknob,almost everywhere

you wash your hands for a full 3 mins and then close the faucet with your elbows and turn open the doorknob with a tissue and push the door with your feet,after using the public washroom.

every person around you tells his/her aches and pains and expects you to tell them what medicines to take

everytime the doorbell rings you are reminded of the patient call bell…

you can discuss poo and pee and puke and every anatomy of a human body over meals…

people feel you are hot because they have seen Udita Goswami and Bipasha Basu as nurses on T.V

you can find out even the finest of mistakes in a medical drama..

you describe things on the basis of color,consistency,amount,smell, appearance…….

One amazing use of the test will be….

R C S M  Parents invite proposal for their daughter 26 years, 5’4” working in a reputed hospital. Vitals:37oC/92/24.BMI-18. seeks  alliance from well to do and settled boys.with vitals 37oC/72-100/12-24,BMI-18.5-24. Respond with complete physical examination report

urine test,stool test report

HIV-HBSAg report blood tests (all possible ones..additional ones can be produced later)

X-ray(complete body preffered)

ECG, EEG complete heart evaluation

Semen analysis

‘SPIT KIT’ report….  

Note:Vitals :temperature/pulse and respiration BMI: body mass index .

This ad is for representational purpose only…..

Local  Trains are the best news media specially the ladies dabba…Its an amazing   entertainment media.. You get all the latest news along with personal opinions,debates,panel discussions,expert opinions and all this  in 1-2 hours.. Sometimes (i should say most of the times)this is spiced up by heated discussions….here’s one….

1 person:Oye!!!Kay dhakelte????

2 person:(raising her voice two octaves higher) Gardi ahe tyamule dhakka laagli!!!mala kaahi shouk naahi tumchya angaavar padaayala!!!!

1:( pitch in the third octave…A feat even famous singers couldnot accomplish)Aawaaz kami kara…dadagiri karte ka????

2: mee awaaz karnaar…hee tujhi aaichi/bapchi/kakachi/mamachi/maradchi…..(any1 of the options)gaadi aahe ka!!!!

What follows next is some incomprehensible sounds…followed by shouts from the audience….the session ends with one person gettin off the train….

Today  I happened to overhear a relatively mild pitched conversation…..

1 person:Arey yeh tere haath pe kya hua???kahi laga kya??(there is a scratch on the first persons hand)

2 person: arey kya bataoo….saali bandra waaaliyo ka kartoot hai!!!!

1: aila kya hua???

2: mein drwaaze pe khadi thi aur jaise hi bandra aaya,teen char choriya bade bade bag lekar chad gayi..@#$%^$# ki bag ki buckle lag gayi mere haath mein…dekho kaise cheer daala mere haath ko!!!!

1: arey ye bandra waaliya aise hi hai!!!!!inko chadne dena hi nahi chaahiye!!!

2: bhaabhi hamari group ne 1 plan banaya hai…hum pin leke darwaaze pe khade hone waale hai…aur jaisi hi yeh ladkiya chadengi ,mere haath ka jo haal kiya na…usse bura haal kar doongi!!!!!(beams with pride as if it is a million dollar nobel winning idea  )Kaisa laga hamara plan bhaabhi????

1: arey bohot acha plan hai…in logo ko aisaich sabak sikhaane ka!!!!

I am thankful that I dont board the train from Bandra….bt i only hope no person from nallasopara has heard this conversation….(i board from the station after nallasopara)

The manufacturers of  ’shehenshah’ costume(the famous Amitabh movie)have a good opportunity in hand….your unique costume will be helpful in the future for train commuters!!!!!

Disclaimer: The Eng-marathi used in the post is due to time constraints and laziness of the author to type in Marathi.There is no intention to hurt the sentiments of the so called messiahs of  Marathi Manoos…..